First Impressions

Friday, November 14, 2014

By: Toai, as told to Tran My Hang, Communications, World Vision Vietnam

My name is Toai. When I was born, my family was shocked because of my appearance and that I didn’t have any fingers or toes. Apparently, only my parents would hold me and nobody else would because they were too scared.

As I’ve got older, nothing much has changed. Kids still cry when they see me and some adults even run away when they see my face. They say I’m a ghost.

I didn’t have any friends in my neighbourhood, but I didn’t worry too much about what I looked like. I was aware that people didn’t like me, but I was more concerned about being a burden to my parents.

There are four people in my family. My dad is a ‘xe om’ [motorbike taxi] driver and my mum sells insurance, but both their incomes are unstable. Despite that, my younger brother and I have never gone a day without food.

Before, I didn’t have a job and my brother was still young, so our parents had to cook and take care of us every day after work. They always looked exhausted and I felt useless.

I kept wondering if anyone would ever give me a job or would everyone be too scared to accept me given my strange appearance? These thoughts affected me very much.

The first time I ever felt important was when my mum took me to a World Vision children’s club.

I was sitting on a swing when a boy ran over and asked: “What’s your name?” and “How old are you?”
It was the first time someone had ever done that, so Hoang Anh’s questions made me really happy. Since then, he’s been one of my closest friends.

"The first time I ever felt important was when my mum took me to a World Vision children’s club."

At the club, I learned how to write and count and how to do simple tasks by myself, so I wouldn’t have to depend completely on my parents.

One day, after several years at the club, I told my teacher that I wanted a small business selling newspapers or lottery tickets. After discussing my idea, we decided on newspapers, with World Vision giving me some money to get started.

Every day, I get up early to deliver the newspapers. I work from 5.30 to 7.30 in the morning and then go to our small shop, where I stay with my friends until 10.00am to sell more papers. I give all the money we make each day to my teacher, who keeps it for us and uses it to pay us a monthly salary.

Each month, I earn about 600,000–700,000 dong [USD$28–33], which is enough for me and means I can help my mum when she has financial difficulties.

I used to dream about having surgery on my face, hands and feet to make me look handsome, or at least normal. But now I just want my parents to have a better quality concrete house because ours is in poor condition.

I feel much happier about my life. I can walk, cycle, run and play football. Actually, I’m luckier than some of my friends in the club who have cerebral palsy or can’t move their hands or feet. And another friend doesn’t have enough money to buy a wheelchair, even though he hasn’t been able to walk for years. I hope they all have better care soon to feel useful and valuable like me.


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Pham Thi Oanh, a volunteer at Toai’s children’s club in District 8, Ho Chi Minh City, says:

I remember the first day Toai came to the club because he asked if I was scared of him. To be honest, I was a bit, but I told him that I wasn’t because otherwise I wouldn’t be able to teach him.

I was worried that he wouldn’t be able to join in with our activities because he doesn’t have any fingers, but he’s very skilful. He holds a pen or spoon between his hands, so he can write and eat.

Others avoided him at first, but now they’re used to his appearance and are friendly with him because he’s very kind. They even help him by buying his newspapers.

Toai is very brave and helpful. He’s always smiling and never has problems walking. He often helps look after other children in the club too, especially those who are younger than him.