War widows and children in Azerbaijan yet to recover from loss
The loss they experienced through these tragic events is sensed when looking in their eyes or listening to their voices. There are many wives, mothers and sisters yet to recover like Sevinj and Zumrud, as the war took an estimated 20 – 30,000 lives during half a decade, and more than one million fled their homes.
“The conflict had already started when we got married. But, I would never have thought that our marriage would last only three years. Our daughter was three years old when he was killed in war,” says Sevinj, bursting into tears. She says every time she speaks about him, about her difficult life after his death and displacement from their native land of the Jabrayil district, she hopes for consolation to ease her pain. “I have survived thanks to my parents and brothers. They have always been beside me, taking care of me and my daughter. But I will always miss him.”
Being displaced for people who had nice homes, work and a peaceful life is unbearably difficult. Sevinj, her daughter and parents had to leave their house and found refuge in Asfaltbeton community of Sumgayit city. They live in a small house with eight other family members. The main income of the family is a pension and subsidies from the government.
I cannot compare our life here to what we had there. Everything feels so cold and lifeless here. My only hope here is my daughter. All I do, I do for her. I want her to live a happy life, not like mine.
“I cannot compare our life here to what we had there. Everything feels so cold and lifeless here. My only hope here is my daughter. All I do, I do for her. I want her to live a happy life, not like mine,” says Sevinj.
Sevinj’s daughter Seadet is now 16 and attends secondary school. She is in the 10th grade and will soon finish school. “I want to be a journalist and write about nature and historical places,” says Seadet enthusiastically.
“I want to be a good daughter to my mother and be a good mother to my children. I want to have two children – a boy and a girl. I always needed a brother or a sister who I could talk, joke and play with,” she adds.
When asked if she is happy with her daughter’s dreams, Sevinij simply states, “My only dream is to see her happy and in good health.”
Zumrud lives in a small room in a dormitory with her 17-year-old son Ilkin. She keeps the photo of her husband who was killed in 1992 on the table all the time.
“He was killed on the battlefield. We buried his body at night because of shootings,” says Zumrud. Zumrud begins to break down, sobbing as she speaks of receiving her husband’s body. Still she continues, “I want people to know how we, women, suffer from the war.”
I want people to know how we, women, suffer from the war
For women in Azerbaijan, like in many other nations, family means everything. “When I lost him, I realized that I lost my closest friend and support in the world. I was not thinking much about myself, but about our son. We had waited for him six years and we had great plans. Now, there is only me to take care of him.”
“He was one year old when I lost my husband. When he was three, he started asking about his father. Every time I told him that his father was away working. One day, one of our neighbors told him that his father was killed in war. I had no other choice but to tell him the truth.” The truth was not easy for her son to understand at such a young age. He slept that night with his father’s photo. “Sometimes he says he will fight and avenge his father’s death. But I don’t want him to fight, I do not want to lose my last hope in this life.”
Zumrud says that Ilkin plans on becoming a driver because he does not want to spend time on higher education and needs to take care of his mother. Like many young people in his situation, Ilkin’s future has fallen victim to his family’s difficult living conditions due to their loss; education has been sacrificed to earn money as soon as possible to support the family.
When I lost him, I realized that I lost my closest friend and support in the world. I was not thinking much about myself, but about our son. Now, there is only me to take care of my son.
Sevinj and Zumrud say they have not forgotten anything and are not fully recovered from the tragedy they survived. They hope they will find peace when the war ends and they go back to their native lands, when their children, who are their hopes for the future, will grow up and take care of them.
Women in Azerbaijan typically are not open to strangers and do not speak much about their families, husbands, and concerns. Sevinij and Zumrud agreed to share their stories, as they have known World Vision for many years. They are not only beneficiaries but also assist with World Vision Azerbaijan activities in their communities. “When I help your people in our community I feel useful and alive after all that has happened to me,” says Zumrud Khalilova.
World Vision Azerbaijan has been working in these communities since 2004. The Improving Lives of Vulnerable IDP Mothers and Children in Azerbaijan Project (ILMC), funded by World Vision Australia, addresses mortality and morbidity among children through various trainings and services. The project has been extended for two more years with specific focus on child disability, advocating for their rights and their integration into society.
“The conflict had already started when we got married. But, I would never have thought that our marriage would last only three years. Our daughter was three years old when he was killed in war,” says Sevinj, bursting into tears. She says every time she speaks about him, about her difficult life after his death and displacement from their native land of the Jabrayil district, she hopes for consolation to ease her pain. “I have survived thanks to my parents and brothers. They have always been beside me, taking care of me and my daughter. But I will always miss him.”
Being displaced for people who had nice homes, work and a peaceful life is unbearably difficult. Sevinj, her daughter and parents had to leave their house and found refuge in Asfaltbeton community of Sumgayit city. They live in a small house with eight other family members. The main income of the family is a pension and subsidies from the government.
I cannot compare our life here to what we had there. Everything feels so cold and lifeless here. My only hope here is my daughter. All I do, I do for her. I want her to live a happy life, not like mine.
“I cannot compare our life here to what we had there. Everything feels so cold and lifeless here. My only hope here is my daughter. All I do, I do for her. I want her to live a happy life, not like mine,” says Sevinj.
Sevinj’s daughter Seadet is now 16 and attends secondary school. She is in the 10th grade and will soon finish school. “I want to be a journalist and write about nature and historical places,” says Seadet enthusiastically.
“I want to be a good daughter to my mother and be a good mother to my children. I want to have two children – a boy and a girl. I always needed a brother or a sister who I could talk, joke and play with,” she adds.
When asked if she is happy with her daughter’s dreams, Sevinij simply states, “My only dream is to see her happy and in good health.”
Zumrud lives in a small room in a dormitory with her 17-year-old son Ilkin. She keeps the photo of her husband who was killed in 1992 on the table all the time.
“He was killed on the battlefield. We buried his body at night because of shootings,” says Zumrud. Zumrud begins to break down, sobbing as she speaks of receiving her husband’s body. Still she continues, “I want people to know how we, women, suffer from the war.”
I want people to know how we, women, suffer from the war
For women in Azerbaijan, like in many other nations, family means everything. “When I lost him, I realized that I lost my closest friend and support in the world. I was not thinking much about myself, but about our son. We had waited for him six years and we had great plans. Now, there is only me to take care of him.”
“He was one year old when I lost my husband. When he was three, he started asking about his father. Every time I told him that his father was away working. One day, one of our neighbors told him that his father was killed in war. I had no other choice but to tell him the truth.” The truth was not easy for her son to understand at such a young age. He slept that night with his father’s photo. “Sometimes he says he will fight and avenge his father’s death. But I don’t want him to fight, I do not want to lose my last hope in this life.”
Zumrud says that Ilkin plans on becoming a driver because he does not want to spend time on higher education and needs to take care of his mother. Like many young people in his situation, Ilkin’s future has fallen victim to his family’s difficult living conditions due to their loss; education has been sacrificed to earn money as soon as possible to support the family.
When I lost him, I realized that I lost my closest friend and support in the world. I was not thinking much about myself, but about our son. Now, there is only me to take care of my son.
Sevinj and Zumrud say they have not forgotten anything and are not fully recovered from the tragedy they survived. They hope they will find peace when the war ends and they go back to their native lands, when their children, who are their hopes for the future, will grow up and take care of them.
Women in Azerbaijan typically are not open to strangers and do not speak much about their families, husbands, and concerns. Sevinij and Zumrud agreed to share their stories, as they have known World Vision for many years. They are not only beneficiaries but also assist with World Vision Azerbaijan activities in their communities. “When I help your people in our community I feel useful and alive after all that has happened to me,” says Zumrud Khalilova.
World Vision Azerbaijan has been working in these communities since 2004. The Improving Lives of Vulnerable IDP Mothers and Children in Azerbaijan Project (ILMC), funded by World Vision Australia, addresses mortality and morbidity among children through various trainings and services. The project has been extended for two more years with specific focus on child disability, advocating for their rights and their integration into society.
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